Perhaps not all women ask themselves the question: close people go to the army - how to survive this? Some ladies know how to calmly let go even the most dear people. This does not mean that a person is not dear to them. It's just that such women, as it were, abstract from this, they try not to think that a close man is not around. But not everyone manages to survive care with such ease. It seems to some ladies that it is easier for them to go to the army themselves than to let their loved one go there. How can they convince themselves that if a man goes into the army, this is far from the end of the world.
The guy went into the army: how to survive
First, you never need to show the guy who is going to serve how bad you are. Of course, it is also impossible to completely restrain emotions. But, it's one thing when you once allow yourself to cry on his shoulder. And it’s completely different when you constantly tell him about how terrible you are, how you don’t want to live without him, and at the same time, you cry all the time. Remember that your friend, boyfriend or brother is also not easy at all. He just understands that nothing can be changed and tries to control himself. And the fact that you constantly throw tantrums and worry, spoils his nerves and upsets him. Of course, he understands that it is not easy for you and will be bored too. And believe me, it will be much more difficult and worse for him than for you. It's just that your future military man will not have as much free time as you do to cry over photographs and remember every little thing. Therefore, try to control yourself and, first of all, support him.
But even if you find the strength to hold back when your loved one is around, how can you not fall into depression after he goes to pay his debt to the Motherland.
So, first of all, by no means allow yourself to be swayed by nostalgia. The more you listen to your favorite songs, watch movies, and go out to places you often liked to go, the worse it will be for you. Understand that, in the end, no one died and that's just for one year. Of course, it’s hard and bad without the support of a loved one, but this is far from the worst thing that could happen to you. Try to think optimistically and think that your boyfriend (friend, brother) would not want you to practically destroy yourself, yearning. Remember that once, back in the nineteenth century, they were taken into the army for as much as twenty-five years. That was really scary. The women of those times could still be understood. And the main thing for you is not to become limp and do something useful.
Of course, we all have heard about what is happening in the modern army and fantasy paints the most terrible pictures for us. You never have to dwell on it. In the end, if you constantly think about the bad, then it happens, and if you tune in to the positive, everything ends well. Your native man is not a fool and will be able to navigate in the current conditions. Do not underestimate his capabilities and assume that he will definitely do something wrong, which will entail terrible consequences.
Every year, hundreds of thousands of young people go through the army and only a few really complain about what is happening. Therefore, you do not need to tune in yourself, and even more so, set up the future campaigner for the fact that something will definitely happen to him.
During the service, you will be able to call up from time to time, so it will not be so hard for you without a loved one. The main thing is to survive the first months, when, most likely, he will not have the opportunity to communicate normally. Then, when he starts calling you, control yourself and don't whine. Of course, you can say that you miss him, and you miss him, but you don’t need to throw tantrums again. Understand that he wants to hear native voices, get a portion of positive and energy in order to have the strength to serve further. And if you bring him one frustration and negativity, then it may happen that the guy will stop calling you at all. Therefore, always control your emotions and do not allow yourself to put your own feelings above those of others.
When your loved one serves, you do not need to close yourself off from the whole world and turn into a hermit. So you will only get worse. Chat with your friends, have fun, travel, relax. You should not sacrifice yourself, arguing this with approximately the following phrases: if he cannot have a normal time, then I will give up everything out of a sense of solidarity. A normal person will never appreciate such sacrifices and consider them stupid on your part. Therefore, behave adequately and do not go to extremes. No need to keep calendars and cross out days. So you will only focus on the fact that a loved one is not around. It is best not to think about time and just live. Go about your business, get involved in something new, meet people. If you do this, then this year will be much easier and simpler than you thought. Of course, at first it will not be very easy for you, but over time you will learn to treat what is happening philosophically and stop getting hung up on the fact that there is no person nearby whom you love and cherish.
Someone believes that the army makes a young man a man, someone believes that conscription should be avoided at all costs. Nevertheless, all healthy young people in our country are faced with the need to decide what to do with their “debt to the Motherland”. Regardless of whether a young man wants to serve or not, he needs to know the legal aspects of the service and when they are drafted into the army.
People are drafted into the army from the age of 18 to 27.
Article 59 of the Constitution indicates that every adult citizen can and must defend the Fatherland. This includes, among other things, the performance of military service in the manner prescribed by federal law. The Constitution also guarantees the right to replace military service with alternative civilian service. How exactly this will happen, must install the appropriate .
According to this law, young men from 18 to 27 years old (conscription age) who are fit for health reasons are subject to conscription. The number of conscripts is determined by a Presidential decree, which is issued for each conscription. Girls and men over 27 years old can serve in the army under the contract. Underage citizens do not serve in the army.
A deferment from conscription is also established if there are any circumstances that do not allow the young man to go to serve in the next conscription. For those who cannot hold a weapon in their hands for any reason, there is a procedure for replacing military service with an alternative one.
The Constitution establishes the right and duty of every citizen to defend the Fatherland. The corresponding article is supplemented by Federal Law No. 53, which establishes military duty for all young men aged 18-27. It also indicates the procedure for conscription into the army and obtaining deferrals from it and other legal aspects related to military service.
Also, before each call (twice a year), the President issues a decree in which he determines the required number of recruits. This number is distributed among the military registration and enlistment offices.
The law establishes two periods when conscription into the army takes place - spring and autumn conscription. They last respectively from April 1 to July 15 and October 1 to December 31. At this time, young men who are suitable for conscription into the army receive summons, according to which they must appear in and pass a commission.
This does not mean that a young man will definitely be called up in this particular half of the year - if the plan for conscription in his military registration and enlistment office is completed, some of the recruits go home until the next call.
The delay does not exempt from conscription, but only allows you to leave for the army later.
For those recruits who cannot go to serve in the current draft, deferrals are provided. The basis for their provision are:
It should be remembered that the delay does not exempt from conscription in general, it is valid for a certain time (six months or a year). It can be extended, but for this you should regularly confirm your right to deferment. Contrary to popular belief, homosexual orientation is not a reason for postponing, exempting from service or replacing it with an alternative civilian one.
The call takes place twice a year - in spring and autumn. This is done in order to fully staff the armed forces with recruits. The number of people they come to is always chosen with a margin - someone will receive a deferment from conscription, someone will write an application for alternative civilian service. If those who are deemed fit will be more than the draft plan requires, some of the draftees will go home.
Sometimes the military enlistment office can (but is not obliged to) meet the needs of some conscripts who want to join the army during this particular call. For example, young people who need to be drafted into the spring draft in order to be demobilized for the work of selection committees.
The timing of the spring and autumn conscription is not the same throughout the country:
The conscript receives summons of 4 different types.
There are 4 types of summons to the draft board, and the conscript gets acquainted with each of them sequentially. The very first of them is the summons to the medical board. It can be brought at any time, but the date of appearance in the military registration and enlistment office should be only within the spring or autumn draft.
Another important point is the delivery process. The summons can be brought home or to work, but it is obligatory to hand it over personally to the draftee, about which he signs. This can be done by an employee of the commission (if he came home) or an employee in charge of military duty (at work).
The summons to the medical examination should not come by mail, it should not be given to third parties (except for the responsible employee at work) - this is illegal. Also, employees of the military registration and enlistment office cannot demand to immediately go to the commission with them - this is also illegal. But they can come along with employees.
The next summons that the conscript receives after passing the medical examination is for a meeting of the draft commission, where it will be decided whether he will be called this time. It can be given at the medical board or sent by mail. In this case, personal delivery is not required. The third agenda - for sending to the place of service or the ACS (fourth type of agenda). It is sent by mail, it cannot be ignored - this is considered evasion from service and is punishable by law.
The first thing a conscript goes through is a medical commission. It includes several specialists:
Each of them makes a conclusion about the possibility of military service for this conscript. As a result, the young man receives one of the five categories of fitness for the army;
The draft board decides which of the recruits to call this year. It takes into account several factors. The first of them is the decision of the medical commission. The second is the presence of deferrals and exemptions for other reasons (study, family affairs, political activities,). The third is the call plan. You need to come to the meeting of this commission in order to provide documents giving a deferment on time.
If the young man is fit for military service and has no deferrals, he receives a distribution. The type of troops where he will have to serve depends on the state of health and professional training of the young man. The place of service depends on the need of a particular military unit for recruits.
Watch a video about the recruitment process:
IN relations with a very young guy, one big problem can suddenly arise - this is conscription into the army. If your young man nevertheless made the decision to serve, you, whether you like it or not, will have to come to terms with it. Try not to exaggerate, in fact, everything is not as bad as you think. And there is no need to throw a tantrum to your young man, throwing himself on his neck with the words "don't leave, I won't let you go." It is possible that he himself is not enthusiastic about this idea, but he simply has no other choice.
Not get upset so much, because now the service life has been reduced to one year, and this, you see, is not so much. Remember, in the old days, men served for decades. Of course, during parting, it will seem to you that life is over, and this year will last like a hundred years, but in fact this time can fly by very quickly if you find yourself a worthy occupation.
1) Over time absence a guy can do many useful things, thanks to which he will be proud of you after his return. For example, improve your studies at the university. Surely, thanks to your dedication and constant meetings with your loved one, you often waved your hand at studying, not paying much attention to it. And now, when you have a lot of free time, you can easily catch up.
Visit the library carefully get ready to the seminar, try to get the exams automatically. If you've never closed an entire session perfectly, it's time to give it a try. After all, for the whole year you will have as many as two chances to stand out from your student group during the exams. Imagine how pleased your young man will be with you.
2) If you are not student, and you are trying to build a stunning career, a forced separation can also have a beneficial effect on you. Also, due to the fact that you will have a lot of free minutes, you can get an additional job or continue to improve in your chosen profession by attending courses and trainings. I think your young man will be incredibly happy if you meet him in a year and tell him about a new position. Pride for you will overwhelm him.
3) You can change your appearance. Sign up for a gym, start following the right regimen, filter your diet, in general, start living a healthy lifestyle. Not only will the extra pounds go away without a trace, so you can still cheer yourself up and find a pleasant lightness in your body.
If you tuned in for dramatic changes, recolor your hair, make a styling or a fashionable hairstyle.
You are want to so that your boyfriend does not recognize his girlfriend upon arrival? Then do everything for it. Go shopping, update your wardrobe. You may even want to change your style. Thinking about how delighted your boyfriend will be when he sees you should further stimulate you to such updates.
4) Find some new hobby try to learn something. Roller skating, skating, card reading, sewing, cooking. But how many interesting things in life that you have not yet mastered? Show your imagination, dig deeper into your memory and remember, maybe you had some kind of dream or goal, but for some reason you forgot about it? It's time to return to this and try to achieve something in the field that interests you.
Endure this year without the hugs of a loved one not easy, because before they would not have parted for more than a week. But what a good test of time it is, because if your feelings are sincere and real, they will only get stronger after such a test. It is possible that after arriving from, your young man will want to take your relationship to a new level in gratitude to you for being able to wait for him.
The army has telephones and Internet, so you can still virtually keep in touch with each other, exchange SMS messages that can bring long-forgotten romance into your relationship. After your loved one returns to their homeland, you will experience a great sense of pride that you are not a simple guy's girlfriend, but a real soldier.
Fulfillment of constitutional duty. According to the Federal Law "On Military Duty", citizens of the country aged 18 to 27 who permanently reside on its territory are subject to conscription into the army. Non-residents are not subject to conscription and are not even included in the military register. Since January 1, 2008, it has become equal to one year.
There is an opportunity to carry out alternative service. But its term exceeds 12 months and is equal to 18-21 months. This right is given only if there are special indications.
Persons who have graduated from military departments become officers and are enrolled in the reserve.
When a young person turns 17, he must undergo a mandatory medical examination. The commission of doctors examines the young man, reveals diseases, pathologies and makes a verdict on whether he is fit for service or not. If fit, then he has a registration certificate. At the age of 18, a young man receives a summons from the military registration and enlistment office. Then he will have to undergo a repeated medical commission. Possible reasons for the delay are identified. Higher and secondary vocational educational institutions provide a deferment to a young person for the duration of training, this rule does not apply to correspondence students. If there is no evidence not to serve in the Armed Forces of the Russian Federation, then the guy is informed of the date and time when he will need to appear with things.
It happens that after the third medical examination, the young man, for medical reasons, is recognized as unfit for service, and he is sent back home.
WikiHow is a wiki, which means that many of our articles are written by multiple authors. When creating this article, 14 people worked on editing and improving it, including anonymously.
The military is always stressful for couples, and this trend seems to be getting worse. However, with the right tools and planning, employee-civilian relationships can even be strengthened by such stress, and strengthened by perseverance. You must know how you will keep in touch with your family during the service; how much it will cost each week. Find out when you can get time off to visit your spouse at home.
Establish a connection before they leave. Often, a loved one receives a notification before being sent to military service. Use this time wisely. Avoid the temptation to fight or criticize each other. Try to understand what your partner is going through. In some places, military service is not something one can choose one's own free will. Don't dwell on the thought that you might lose each other. Instead, enjoy the time you spend together and grow closer as a couple. Work to connect on deeper emotional levels and try to look to the future with optimism.
Prepare for change. When a person enters military service, he often has to leave home, sometimes for several years. Get ready for it. Work on making plans. It may be worth creating a plan and getting a job near the location. However, don't do it immediately. Wait until they get to the new base and get comfortable, otherwise the move can create undue stress for your soldier as he tries to fit in with the new unit. Discuss it and wait until you get the go-ahead to act.
Get ready for a change in your partner. Almost every army in the world has a young fighter course. It is designed to teach civilians how to survive combat, maintain discipline, and prepare them to become effective soldiers. This initial course is usually challenging and can be a life-changing experience for many recruits. Get ready for these changes. Don't blame your partner for them; these changes often symbolize the adaptations they had to go through in order to survive the rigors of the training course.
Prepare for change in yourself. When your partner leaves, you will have to find meaning in independence in order to continue living. Just as they need to adapt to the new environment, you will have to do the same. It's good to have a support community nearby, and networking ahead of time definitely helps. Try to find common friends and family members who know both of you well. If it was just you and your partner, you can get very lonely if you don't even have anyone to talk to. Although you may feel the urge to abandon your partner, try not to. If you leave him when he is away, he may feel abandoned and betrayed.
Communicate as much as possible. Many core training programs restrict communication with loved ones to simulate the harsh conditions of war. Despite this, it is important to use every possible means to continue communication. Share your feelings openly and try not to hide anything. This can be a very difficult time, and feeling like something is being hidden can add to stress, unnecessary confrontation, and heartbreak. If your partner is sent to a war zone, be prepared for the fact that opportunities for communication will rarely appear. If letters or phone calls are infrequent, this does not always mean that the partner no longer cares about you. Perhaps it's just the logistical structure that obliges you not to keep in touch.
Enjoy every minute spent together. Sometimes your loved one may get vacation or leave when they can return home. Enjoy the time you spend with him and use him to bond within the couple. However, know that often he will also want to see friends and family. Do not be upset about this, because he did not see his family for as long as he missed you. However, leave time for yourself. Celebrate the strength you both have gained in facing this adversity.
Keep planning for the future. Always keep looking ahead. Having a common goal can help you and your partner grow closer to each other, give you something to look forward to that will inspire and guide you every day. Make sure these goals are realistic and that you have discussed them with each other.
