Has anyone had that the man first left, saying that he did not love, and then returned? and got the best answer
Answer from Ўliya[guru]
Oh yes .... It was. He left saying that he didn't like him. Almost a month has passed, at first I tried to return everything, and then ... Just tired. I started talking to others. I tried to return him, we saw each other once, when I came to him at night through the whole city, just to see .... I saw ... And she went on her way. It was very hard, but I left. And only then he called SAM. Now he follows me himself, but only now I think, is it worth it?? .. He explained the reason for the return as follows: “I can’t find a better and more decent girl than you ... you. . Even with others, I only think about you .. "-and all that ..))) But now I'm talking with another man, and he knows it. And still says that we will be together, no matter what!! ! What I already doubt, once I really wanted it, but now ... Feelings are crushed. And in general, I noticed that the less we worry about them, the better and faster they return!!! What will happen next, I don't know. But only one thing I know for sure - if fate, then we will be together.))) Happiness to you, good luck and love!))
Source: Personal experience))) A little bit bitter, but.. . vital.))
Answer from User deleted[guru]
yes it was :)) now he says that he is crazy about me
Answer from sun[guru]
Yes, when he returned late, as it was already. .
Answer from Elena_sh[guru]
It happened often, apparently they underestimated me when they left, and then compared with others and returned when I was no longer needed.
Answer from Natasha[guru]
Yes, it was, you won’t understand men, how children are needed, then no!
Answer from Polina Petrova[guru]
it’s better not to wait until he says a second time that he doesn’t love, he came because there is nowhere to go, you can’t help but love, and then suddenly fall in love, it’s better not to start a relationship with such a relationship anymore
Answer from Nastya[guru]
oh, it was, he left, he came back, in the end I got tired of all this and I left myself, it’s been a year since we parted and he still walks, although I have already told him more than once that I don’t love him and I won’t return to him !!
Answer from Marinochka[guru]
and my 1 time left found a new one, they dispersed, he returned. 2 times left found another one, they dispersed again returned. now, right now, he left 3 times and I won’t accept him again, and so many times I forgave him for everything. ENOUGH!!
Answer from ***Elena***[guru]
Yes, they are always moving back and forth! My husband, while not yet a husband, left 2-3 times, then dragged himself back. Time passed in different ways, sometimes a couple of weeks, and once even almost six months. So what is the reason for the return? "I love, I can't" .... I let go twice, I didn’t think about him at all, I didn’t call or write, I pinned myself. And the third time she herself went to him and took him home, she did not particularly resist, she was even glad. And when he leaves and says that he doesn’t love, it’s not a fact that he doesn’t love, many people say it in the heat of the moment, or to offend, or they themselves don’t understand that they really love it very much))
Answer from Milena[guru]
was, said that he did not like and left, returned a couple of days later, saying that he could not live without me and that he was very ill. I forgave him, but then we broke up again.
Answer from Sunny[guru]
It happened, I forgave and accepted him, then it happened again, but they were already married, I asked him not to leave, he broke down for a long time, when I was already desperate and spit on everything, he returned again, then a child was born and now I’m waiting for the second, and now it happened again , for 3 months I was ruffling my nerves (and I’m pregnant), then I’m leaving, I say go, he can’t, let’s try again, he says ... And yesterday he left, I won’t accept it again and I won’t forgive let him bite my elbows. One thing is a shame, the children are so small and already without a normal full-fledged family .... Therefore, I advise you to break with such an unreliable selfish person right away, before it's too late.
Answer from Azov Panther[guru]
He left me .. let him go .. he is dear to him like a good tablecloth ... he won’t find me better anyway .. I won’t accept him back .. he lives with his mother’s head .. such a person .. why do I need him like that? .. dear ladies, don’t regret that a man left you, it means it’s better, well, he didn’t love or love has passed .. why regret it .. everything will be fine without him .. you will find your happiness and joy ... life does not end there ... life goes on... and life should be enjoyed.. it is beautiful! He went there and the road! Find even better! I wish you health, happiness and love! With respect to you.
Answer from Nargiz Mustafayeva[newbie]
was. and eat. We've been together 8 times and we can't get together. I have lost a loved one and lost relatives. uproot.
Answer from Lali[guru]
it’s better to let go and leave yourself - there and see his reaction .. at least you won’t lose time .. although what advice do you have - you still won’t leave first, it’s understandable .. wait until he leaves ... and he leaves .. sorry. I see.
Answer from Katusha[guru]
Not yet ... Let's wait and see, maybe it will return ...
Answer from Polina sun[newbie]
Oh yes .... It was. He left saying that he didn't like him. Almost a year has passed, at first I tried to return everything, and then ... I just got tired of it. I started talking to others. I tried to return it, I saw each other once, when my friend and I came for a walk with them, then we stayed overnight through the whole city, just to see .... I saw, I realized that I started all this in vain!
Answer from Andrey arlek1no[newbie]
Good time everyone, can I tell you my situation, maybe someone will tell me what to do. Lived with my wife for 6 years civil marriage then we all got married and lived for another year, after that I started messing around with the girl, my wife talked about playing, but I didn’t take her seriously 1 month passed, I left my wife for this girl, we started living in a place but still thought about my wife, I once returned to my wife, but so far without things, spent the night and went to get things there, that friend to whom I left, there were tears of snot, don’t go away and I felt sorry for her, I stayed, and this continued 4 times I tried to return to my wife, but didn’t could out of pity for another. When I understood everything and realized that I love my wife very much, I had to return, but it was already too late for my wife to file for divorce and now she doesn’t want to know me, but I still love her very much and no one except my wife is needed. Can someone tell me what to do??? maybe it’s true that she’s fine without me and needs to put up with it and give her free rein !!
Psychologist's answer:
Good afternoon dear Anna, sorry to keep you waiting, thank you for your question.
Tell me please, how much more would you endure? And why do you need to endure such an attitude towards yourself? Is this the kind of relationship you want? Do you deserve this from life?
I understand that you wanted to sincerely love and be loved, just that man has not met on your way at the moment.
Understand me correctly, I don’t want to offend you, you lived with a guy for 3 years, and what kind of relationship did you have? That he left, he came! You know, when a man is gone once, it must always be the last time! When he has made a choice that he is better off without you, then in no case do you need to keep him!
You understand me at the age of 18, of course you are in love, but you should not lose your head for the sake of those who do not appreciate us, because in a relationship there should be respect, understanding, help.
Excuse me, did he tell you that he does not see you as his wife? So if so, why were you with him?
So he made his choice! Good luck to him, you do not hold anger at him, forgive him if there is anything for it, and wish him all the best or even write all the words on a piece of paper.
Answer me, please, imagine a big apple tree, where there are a lot of fruits and tell me which apple you reach for, what is from below, or will you climb higher or to the very top?
So, now let's get down to how to forget him. To begin with, we collect all thoughts about him in a heap and mentally throw them out of our heads. Then, we throw away all his things, gifts, photos, SMS, toys, everything that reminds you of him. We clean the room, do a general cleaning and ventilate the room with the thought that all memories are fading away.
Further, if possible, sign up for oriental dances or others that are in your spirit, in order not to think and meet new people.
Write on a piece of paper all the features of your future boyfriend that you would like, and put it in the bedside table, anything can be on the piece of paper, height, weight, leg size, character traits ...
You have to love yourself and try for yourself. I want to suggest you change a little, maybe a haircut or dye your hair, in general, change.
You understand that all relationships, all events in our lives teach us something. That is, life has taught you a lesson for which you will say thank you.
A new level has begun in our life, where you have matured. You know what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. So in your new relationship you will be wiser and will not make the same mistakes.
So my dear Anna, good luck to you, as they say, keep your tail with a gun, sort out your thoughts and understand what you want and you will definitely have it.
Today you are sure that you are doing everything right. I am convinced that people like you do not leave. You have no doubt that he is yours forever, the only one in the world who is able to listen, understand, sympathize, reassure, support, protect. It's today, and tomorrow... he can leave.
Marriage is a long voyage in a cramped cabin. And it's natural that nerves sometimes fail.
Maybe the reason was a banal trifle - finding out who the real Winner of Eurovision 2011 is, or discussing the family budget, but now - the man left. Just don't panic! Could it be that you no longer need it? Maybe you are just not yet able to understand that his departure is yours. Take a breath, think while there is time. But, if there is still something to fight for, then remember that, most likely, you will have a chance to fix everything. Because husbands most often come back.
After his departure, you "tear your hair" and are tormented by questions:
Why did he leave? It is possible and necessary to analyze your life with him, look for the reasons in yourself, in him, in your own ... Such an analysis will not hurt. Sooner or later, life makes everyone look back at the past years, experience the bitter feeling of parting with youth, with love. There is a need to rethink your priorities.
Comment on the article "Husband left. Will he return or not?"
“You won’t enter the same river twice” ... I have a situation, but I want my husband to take into account only with my daughter. All that happened in the past, I can’t be just his wife, I want everything to be honest. Just in the future I can make another man's happiness...
If it doesn’t work out, then let me exhaust happiness in this world, it’s all the same that it’s useless to renew it ... this is not the right person, not mine ...
To live on an animal habit, to have sex without respect, and pity, in principle, I could, but I don’t want to lie to myself.
or return or not: 50% to 50%.
02/19/2011 20:18:00, sympathizerTotal 8 messages .
I'm fine. That is, against the background of how it happens with others, it’s good, but in general it’s bad. Every day someone gets divorced, I'm not original. And the man who initiated the breakup is not God knows what a rarity. And children, even small and very, very cute, cease to interest their fathers - and this is not news, it happens. And when compared with what could be - everything is fine. I have my own apartment, I don’t have to go anywhere and re-create life. In September, I will go to work, where they are waiting for me ...
Do you know cases when a husband, having left the family for Great love, after some time he returned back, begged for forgiveness, swore eternal love, etc., that they still owe there. The main thing is not whether he will return or not. And so that the abandoned wife does not live to wait.
The husband begged to return, promised to change. These attempts - to change - lasted about six months. Then it all started again. Only they were from the groom, these children. My husband left for a woman with 2 children different men who bore him 3 sons.
Last night, after the children returned from the camp, the festive dinner and the departure of the soup, the children said that dad suggested that they go to the cinema on the weekend "four of them, along with his new aunt, because he loves her very much, soon they will live together, and he wants to introduce them to each other" O_O The children refused with the words "the four of us want to go only with you and mom", the soup did not insist ... The children "want to see dad, not dad in company with another aunt", as they told me explained your answer... I...
Good day to all! Teach the mind to reason. I am married (by status), my son is 4 years old. The husband is constantly on business trips, he practically never happens at home, and on top of everything else, he has a "she". She appeared a long time ago, almost three years ago, when my relationship with my husband was on the verge of a divorce. But then he allegedly changed his mind, decided that the family was more important and we began to live together again. Then I did not yet know about her presence, I guessed, but I constantly drove thoughts away from me. And then by chance, while cleaning, I found ... Section: Wife and husband (husband said that he had lost feelings for me and went to another). Return to yourself, start any, seriously, even the most stupid hobby (from shaping to cross-stitching), this will help you forget about what is bad for a while, but only necessarily ...
The husband left. Will he return or not? I want to return ex-husband, help! IMHO, after parting it is impossible to return the former, you can only start over, repeat (slightly with others). In this case, you don’t need to try to return what is no longer there.
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rPDRYUBFSHUS ABOUT TBUUSCHMPYULKH "RHFSH TsEOEYOSCH. CHUE UELTEFSHCH MAVCHY" NPTsOP ЪDEUSH:
http://secretylubvi.com/listy.php
'DEUSH TSE chshch OBKDEFE RPDTPVOPE PRYUBOYE TBUUSCHMPYULY Y ZHPTNKH RPDRYULY.
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rTBCHYMB RETEREYUBFLY:
RETEREYUBFLB NPYI UVBFEK TBTEYBEFUS Y RTYCHEFUFCHHEFUS! pVSBFEMSHOPE HUMPCHYE - UPITBOEOYE NPPEZP BCHFPTULPZP VMPLB U TBVPFBAEEK UUSCHMPYULPK, CHEDHEEK ABOUT ZMBCHOKHA UFTBOYULKH NPEPZP UBKFB.
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vHDH TBDB CHUFTEFYFSHUS U chBNY ABOUT UFTBOYULBI NPEK TBUUSCHMLY!
tsemba chbn hdbyuy y mavchy!
lBFETYOB JMYLPR
Warning. This article is addressed to women who are experiencing the departure of a man. He - left, she - remained. Therefore, in the article it sounds that He- did badly. This is not a manifestation of sexism. It happens that a woman leaves, causing pain to a man. Will the husband return to the family? The tips in this article apply in this situation as well.
At the consultation: “I wake up in the morning, go to work. I'm busy at work, I don't have time to think. But in the evening - it begins! I remember everything I did wrong. All your mistakes. That it was necessary to allow him both this and that, when he asked. I think, if I behave differently now, will he come back? Want to know. Suddenly he'll be back."
He may return. That family that was will not return. That, what was before will not return. This is 100% accurate.
The decision on the final separation is comprehended in the first 2-3 weeks. Did I write about this in an article? If, after this period, he still has not changed his mind, has not come with an apology that he got excited, then the decision is final. For you. Now I will explain why.
To be honest, men feel when they are expected. Even if a man left not just like that, but “somewhere”, then the decision to part was probably not easy for him. He's scared too. Understanding that there is an "alternate airfield" makes life very easy.
Therefore, it is in the interests of a man that you wait for him. The longer the better. And if all my life - so generally excellent. You can't blame him for this. In general, it is better not to think about it. Absolutely, in any respect, both positive and negative. Just know - You are free to decide whether to wait or not to wait.
Of course, you can close the door forever from the very moment of his departure. But so few succeed. Therefore, decide for yourself (and maybe with him) that there will be time to think. Two or three weeks. This is the time you are willing to wait. Then the bridges were burned.
How to understand if he wants to return?
You certainly know the expression " to get on one's nerves". Oh, how many descriptions of this process I heard!
All these cases leave the woman with the idea that the husband can return. If she changes, or if he forgives her, or if he has there nothing will work.
But this is deception. Rather, even self-deception. Therefore, there is no need to look for evidence that he is considering the option of returning.
The only confirmation that the husband is considering the option of family reunification can only be an open statement: "I need to understand myself. Please give me time!". This is honest. This is smart. It is a rarity.
Everything else is from the evil one. There is no sign that he wants everything back. Maybe he is rushing about because he is scared (see above). The more he rushes about, the more he gets on your nerves. Maybe not on purpose. But these throwing - not evidence that he wants to return.
If your man has taken time out to make a final decision, then you can help him. Here are actions that will help you make a positive decision and help you understand whether the husband will return to the family. The points.
It turned out not very much, but the point is not in quantity, but in quality. By violating these principles, you are very effective in the direction of the complete destruction of relationships.
Is it possible to miss the chance?
Very scary to hear “I wanted to go back, but you yourself ruined everything!”
I have never seen such cases. Yes, sometimes the husbands come back. But it doesn't happen that you did something, because of which he could not return, although he wanted to.
Theoretically, this is, of course, possible. If he kneels in the door next to the suitcase and asks for forgiveness, and you silently slam the door. This is probably the only scenario where "I wanted to, but you ruined everything"
Point of no return.
When you are no longer with him, everything seems meaningless and terrible. Life turned upside down. There is nothing further. Because you are used to a different life. You are waiting for everything to come back. It will be like it was again.
But it won't be the same as it used to be.
Yes, there are times when couples get back together. A month, a year, it doesn't matter. But any of these pairs will confirm that, having come together again, they began to live in a completely different way. New relationships, new rules.
That is, a person may be physically the same, but the family is different. At heart, people change because of the stress they have experienced.
Accept it as a fact. You definitely cannot return “that” man, that image of him, and “that” relationship.
Every time a thought pops into your head - “What if he comes back?”, remind yourself that HE, such as he was, will not return.
When discussing life after divorce with women, I come across descriptions of situations when a husband returns. Here is how it is described:
"Him there nothing succeeded. He asked for forgiveness and wanted to return. Of course, I didn't drive him away. Yes, I was very hurt and hurt, but still I love him! We started living together again. But I couldn't do it the way I used to. Like the same person. But now I know that he is lying. Can lie. Can hurt. I used to enjoy looking at his smile. And now that smile pisses me off! Because I know who he is! Basically, everything has changed.”
How not to ask yourself this again and again?
Even if we assume that the husband rashly decided to part, then in 3 weeks he managed to cool down, to think. And think three more times. Three weeks is the deadline.
If he has not yet come, then waiting for him further is just a mockery of himself. Make a decision - "I no longer look forward to his return!"
Now your most best friend – intelligence. Your protector, your support, your hope. Trust him. Mind said - I CAN'T WAIT TO RETURN!" Now, every time you catch yourself trying to dream about the return of your husband, get distracted. By force of will or by accident.
Do you know how to effectively help children not be afraid to do their homework? On the principle of "cut the elephant into slices." That is, you first need to spend a few minutes preparing the textbooks. Then - a break for other things. After some time, we open the textbooks on the desired page, put a notebook in front of the textbook. Distracted again. After some more time, they sat down and did one task. We don't take anything off the table. So, gradually, all the tasks will be done. But this is not the main thing. The main thing is that the child will not be afraid of the process.
Why did I give this example? In addition, it is necessary to distract from memories and thoughts about returning in the same way. Wherever you live - around the apartment, on the way to work - there should be little charms.
Let's say you lay out the elements of your hobby on the table. And in the kitchen - open the book in the place where the desired recipe is. And in the room - just a book that you read. And lay the route to work in such a way as to walk past beautiful shop windows. That is, you must constantly be distracted by something.
To be honest, I wouldn't recommend it for any other situation. Usually they ask for help to concentrate. But now you have the opposite goal.
Is it fair? While your man decides what he wants, you cannot drink, eat, breathe. This does not mean that he is cruel. He is ordinary. And here you are - you waste time and nerves. No matter what he decides, you are hurt here and now. Instead of predicting what decision he will make, think about yourself. How take away your pain. Do not expect gifts of fate, eh.
