The first thing any woman pays attention to is appearance. In a few seconds, we scan a man who has fallen into the field of vision, noting to himself how he is dressed, shod, how he smells, shaved and combed. If everything suits us from an aesthetic point of view, we put a tick in our minds in front of the phrase “seems to fit”. And we begin to perceive the man "by ear", that is, we evaluate what and how he says. And to observe - to evaluate how a man behaves in society. And here, at this stageIt is very important not to rush and carefully listen and watch!
The key to the success of future happiness is already in the early stages of a relationship, determine whether the intended partner is capable of experiencing the highest moral feelings - conscience, empathy, compassion and honesty.
Sometimes this is not easy!
Example:
Lera met Victor at a friends birthday party. A common feast, slow dances to romantic music, a walk under the night moon immediately brought them closer. A week after they met, Lera called Victor her man. He smiled condescendingly in response.
In principle, Lera was pleased with her gentleman. True, Victor could not keep his promises, be late for a date or not come at all. But Lera attributed this to character traits that are unlikely to seriously overshadow their relationship. It didn't bother her that Victor could yell at a woman on the bus who hit him with her elbow. And even when it turned out that Victor could not repay the debt to the husband of the very friend from whom they met, Lera did not sound the alarm. “He loves me,” she shrugged proudly. "And the rest I don't care about."
When did Victor after six months of courtship suddenly stopped communicating, Lera offended and bewildered sobbed: "What a scoundrel he is! If I knew..".
But she knew! I just didn't want to notice!
From the first days, Lena convincingly lied to herself that everything was perfect. That this is her destiny. Lena so wanted to quickly close the “question of finding the second half” that she turned a blind eye to Viktor’s dishonesty in all its manifestations, justifying the situation in every way, and not even comparing the merits and demerits of the chosen one (since he didn’t particularly demonstrate merits, and justify him directly there was nothing corny), but independently attributed to him,imaginary attitude towards her. Lena, being a noble and decent person, really did not want to believe that not everyone in the world is just as noble. She didn't want to admit to herself that Victor was a real bastard. The fictional fairy tale seemed very beautiful.
Such behavior is very typical for a modern highly moral woman who has not lost faith in people. Guided by the stereotype that has settled in my head “you need to get married, because if you sort out men, then you are somehow wrong” and even fueled by emotions and physiological processes characteristic of the initial period of a relationship, women at the very beginning of the path either consciously or unconsciously close their eyes to manifestations of dishonesty on the part of a man. Or they simply do not have practical knowledge of how to determine the true essence of the man whose courtship they accept.
To the question asked in the forehead: “Is he a decent person?” - we will hear either a confident "yes" or a blurry "in relation to me - yes." While the reasonable, calm and wise answer “I hope so, but I cannot say, since we have known each other for a very short time,” we are hardly lucky to hear. And of course, we are unlikely to hear “no”, since either a mentally unintegrated person or a woman who is led by a cold cynical calculation can consciously go into a relationship with a scoundrel.
Psychologists, what are psychologists, ordinary common sense tells us to associate our lives withnoble and decent people. Long term none decent man cannot make any woman happy for long. What is called, by definition. Saying "dishonest" we do not mean a man with correctable shortcomings, such as slovenliness or everyday laziness. We mean a man deprived of the highest moral qualities, such as conscience, sympathy, compassion and honesty, that is, a man who shows signs of psychopathy . And if you know how to correctly analyze a man’s behavior, know the principles of psychology, that is, know what to look at and how to interpret what you see, you can easily guess who is next to you, what is his value system and whether it exists at all.
Imagine that you have an internal counter, and before making a judgment about character human , mentally add one, noticing actions , whichs repeatyatsya more than four times . Analyze the behavior of the person you are watching and track the number of repetitions of behavior patterns that your potential partner chooses for himself in more or less similar situations.
So, a very indicative sign of nature is the desire or unwillingness to take revenge on the offender. If you notice that revenge has manifested itself four times or more, keep in mind. Most likely in front of youpsychopath - a person in whom a sense of anger and cruelty predominates (since revenge is always associated with a manifestation of cruelty and even violence). A person whose personality is governed by love, tolerance and generosity will aim for forgiveness. Yes, he can merge into the offender, he can even resort to revenge (and often regret it later), but these will be one-time, not recurring situations. A if a person takes revenge four times, he will take revenge whenever possible and enjoy it. It is quite possible that one day you or your child will anger him with something. Are you ready to consciously become the object of revenge of a cruel person? Don't think.
The essence of the human soul is most truthfully manifested in crisis situations. No wonder there is a saying that a friend in need is a friend! It is extremely significant that how a person behaves when he has to make a difficult life choice. Does he take a position of unhealthy selfishness and acts solely in his own interests, and chooses a path that is contrary to the interests of everyone else. Or in his actions lies the idea of caring not only for himself, but also for the environment. B a noble person and in a crisis situation will give up personal gain for the well-being of loved ones.
Very revealing in this regard was the behavior of some men against the background of the flood in x. Crimean (Krasnodar Territory). When some men fled, leaving everyone and everything, including their own families. And others, on the contrary, again and again returned to the filled residential buildings, collecting and taking people out. Even strangers. Even those with whom yesterday were in a quarrel.
Noble,decent Human u respects and appreciates not only his own comfort and peace, but equally protects and appreciates the attitudes of the society in which he lives. Please note that how your chosen one treats strangers. Does he interact with service personnel in a cafe, shop or queue. IN outbursts of aggression or rudeness - clear reason alert. Because a man who can be rude to an outside woman will then be rude to the one next to him.
Very well reveal the nature of small domestic troubles that do not concern a person personally. For example, a banal assistance to the driver, stuck on the road cars. You can drive past, or you can get out and help. As a rule, such situations do not take up a lot of time, and yes, you can drive past once, because there is “no time”, you can do it the second time, but when your chosen one regularly ignores such victims, and even allows himself derogatory statements from the series “it’s his own fault ”, keep in mind, one day he may begin to treat you in the same way. Because such disrespect for others is characteristic of him in general, and not of unfortunate drivers in particular. And this must be understood very soberly. Such people show respect only where they seek personal gain. They are not capable of selfless manifestation of positive feelings, if they are able to feel at all (as is the case with psychopaths). Such a person will show or pretend to show love, affection and a desire to help only as long as it is beneficial for him, as long as you give him something that he needs, such as sex or money or a roof over his head. As soon as his need decreases, the incentive to show his best side evaporates from such people. Having connected your life with a person who is guided by the calculation, you risk one day realizing that you have been tritely used.
The potential propensity for betrayal, social and spiritual inconstancy can also be determined by indirect signs. Not always, but very often an excessive need for diversity (in varied food, frequent trips to new places, new entertainment and thrills) indicates that the state of a calm, measured life is such a h man will be hard to bear. The higher your companion's need for new emotions, adventures and thrills, the more likely it is that sexual and social, such as companionship, true awn are unusual for him. He's bored. He will always demand the continuation of the banquet. Yes, some people get older. Others will be able to control the constant desire to “change the picture”, manage it, and even include their partner in the search for new experiences, such as traveling with you. But the fact remains, constancy for such people is a difficult choice.
To understand whether you have met the right person, you must try to objectively assess the degree of his readiness for the routine phenomena of life. Ask if he was diligent in school. Find out if he has hobbies and how often he changed them. Ask your potential lover if he likes to party. Is he into extreme sports? Gently inquire, if convenient, how long his relationship with your predecessors lasted. This is very valuable information, on the basis of which it is easy to judge how constant a person is.
The level of temper and, as a result, aggression can also be recognized by watching a person from the side. Processes are very informative, in which a large number of participants are involved, focused on themselves and their line of behavior, that is, non-team social processes. For example, you learn a lot about your companion by watching him as a participant in public traffic. See how he drives. If he is nervous, swears, twitches from row to row, tries without fail to become the first at the traffic lights, “cuts off” neighboring cars, you can say with a probability of 99% that in family life it will behave exactly the same. Before you is a quick-tempered, hot, aggressive person, for whom the environment is second-class people. Their attitude will be appropriate.
In hell for perfectionists, there is neither fire nor the devil. There are only slightly asymmetrically chipped boilers.
Try to pay attention to howcriticalHumanin relation toto yourself andto others. It is quite possible that behind the desire to bring everything to perfection - this is just a mask behind which lies excessive perfectionism. And constant criticism of everything around is an indicator low self-esteem and self-doubt.
After all, who is a perfectionist? Essentially, this is unloved child, who had to win parental love with perfect homework, clean floors, and immaculately carved crafts. Growing up, perfectionists, who, alas, have not found another way of recognition, continue to strive for ideality and demand ideality from the person who is nearby. Sometimes a perfectionist's desire for perfection turns a relationship into torture. Because they can exert enormous psychological pressure on a partner, justifying their actions with seemingly noble statements from the series “I just want it to be beautiful / right / perfect.” Perfectionists and critics are constantly trying to "improve" their family members, gradually instilling in them the idea that before that they were "not good enough." And although it is possible to fight the manifestations of hyperperfectionism, it is very difficult.
The attitude of a decent person to the people around him is based onthe principle of mutual exchange - "you can not only take or only give." Nature, whose life rules lie in this plane, will always repay debts, will not be afraid to borrow money if close people need it. He will not only accept help, but also show an independent desire to help, that is, the balance of egoism and altruism in a decent person is almost perfect.
In addition, about how decent a person your companion is can be judged by his loyalty to the word. Decent people either keep their promises or don't make them at all. This can also be attributed to selfish lies. If you have witnessed a lie that your relationship partner admonishes someone from his environment, be on the lookout! He will most likely lie within his own family.
Degree vulnerability a partner is determined by how a person reacts to barbs in his address - indifferently or painfully cringing.
It is clear that one should not be offended and that one should protect the one who is nearby if he is not able to protect himself. For example, a man standing up for a woman causes approval and support. However, there are situations when no one planned to attack, but the person himself came up with and was offended. Excessive vulnerability of one of the partners sometimes results in a state of constant tension in a couple, as there is always a fear in the air to say something “wrong” to such a sissy and get another scandal with elements of hysteria. And sometimes even an innocent joke can serve as a signal for resentment. Very well, the level of vulnerability is manifested when a person is in the spotlight. Allow yourself a bold joke about your partner, and by how adequate his reaction will be, you can judge his vulnerability.
Vulnerability, in turn, closely coexists with a person's self-esteem. In order to evaluate the chosen one according to this criterion, it is necessary to follow his reaction to praise. WITH he seems to be thankful and smiles - a sign of healthy self-esteem, begins to make excuses and assures that there is nothing to praise him for, or smugly raises an eyebrow, accepting good words for granted - signs of low self-esteem. Do I need to say that in life together Is it easier to communicate and negotiate with people with normal self-esteem? Because people with low self-esteem are characterized by touchiness, short temper and perfectionism. And in relationships, they most often need a nanny, the meaning of whose life is to pity and help the innocent victim of life's circumstances. And people with high self-esteem do not need a wife, but a fan. People with an abnormal level of self-esteem resist building partnerships, preventing their partner from becoming on the same level with them. They need to stand either a little lower or a little higher. In both cases, the one who is told which step to take suffers more. In healthy relationships, people are on the same level and do not consciously or even unconsciously try to manipulate each other.
Having defined person's character, then it is useful to find out what the prospective partner has life goals, interests, what he wants to get from the relationship. Therefore, communicating is important be silent moreask more questions listen and watch! It is especially important to pay attention to the contradictions in your views on life and in the system of yours and his values, because conflicts in this area will manifest themselves sooner or later. And do not rush to justify the gentleman you like, closing your eyes to emerging shortcomings. Remember, everything that your chosen one does in relation to the environment, he will later broadcast within your union, in relation to you and your children!
And at the same time, do not forget about objectivity! If a person has shown certain signs of deviation from the norm, for example, a temper has manifested itself, this does not mean that the relationship should be put an end to! There are no perfect people, but everyone has flaws. It's just that in some cases they are insignificant and can be corrected, while in others they are incorrigible and unambiguously destructive. For example, the same irascibility in itself is just a character trait, and not a reason to run away from a man. A person may have a hot temperament, be impulsive, but at the same time he will never allow himself to show aggression towards a woman. It's one thing to vehemently scold a politician on TV, and quite another to raise your voice at family members.
How to find this line between a slight tilt towards abnormality and a complete lack of chances for healthy partnerships, read in the following chapters of the book Illusions in Relationships.
The next type of men with whom it is difficult or impossible to build normal relationships and a normal family are Don Juans. Don Juan do not want any relationship with women. They like only exceptionally quick seduction. Many men, of course, are interested in quick sex, but the Don Juans are not interested in anything else.
It is clear that after Don Juan achieves his goal, he very quickly loses interest in the girl (woman). And if this is really Don Juan, and not just a young man with an excess of hormones, then nothing can be done, no matter how hard the girl tries.
How to understand a man whether he is a Don Juan or not? There are not so many real Don Juans, even home-grown ones. However, due to their incredible activity, they can give the impression that they are almost 30%. How to recognize Don Juan?
Increased attention to one's appearance.
This is an indirect and not completely accurate sign, however, it helps to recognize Don Juan well. It can only be used in conjunction with other features of Don Juan.
At the same time, with the help of it, you can easily and most importantly very quickly weed out potential Don Juan from ordinary guys. Then you can already look more closely, which usually takes more time.
So, the average guy, especially the unmarried one, pays little attention to his appearance by the standards of girls. The maximum that guys are capable of is to pump up or buy something expensive. But usually, even if there is money, it is spent on all sorts of gadgets, trips, cars, etc.
Don Juan pays a lot of attention to appearance, as he knows that this is one of his main tools in the rapid conquest of women.
So, what does our potential homegrown Don Juan pay attention to and what do ordinary guys not pay attention to?
- dandruff on the hair. It is rare for a guy to look at the amount of dandruff in his hair.
- wrinkled shirt, trousers, etc. Most regular guys grab the first shirt they can get their hands on, and so on. Sometimes even something is ironed, but something is not.
- Dirty shoes. What is surprising, but guys somewhere up to 30-35 years old very rarely wash or clean their shoes.
- the smell of sweat from the armpits, unshaven hair under the arms. One of the most harmful habits for relationships with girls is the smell of sweat. However, so many ordinary guys do not pay enough attention to this.
- belly in men over 30 years old. In men over 30 years old, in almost 90% of cases, a stomach appears. If he does not appear, then why? Maybe he works in some structure where a high degree of sports training is required? Maybe he is a professional athlete? Maybe he is married and his wife monitors his nutrition and health? Or maybe just Don Juan.
- very small and almost invisible pieces of dirt or food on clothes. Invisible to men, of course. Women usually easily see that there are traces of fat on the trousers, albeit carefully erased by hand. Women see that there is dirt on the sleeves of the shirt, collar, etc.
- in principle, cheap clothes, even if the budget allows it. Quite a few, especially young guys, don't spend a lot of money on nice clothes, even if their income allows.
- hair from the ears and nose. No comments.
- unevenly trimmed or even unkempt fingernails and toenails, etc. A lot of men cut their nails somehow. There are also those who take care of themselves and do it carefully or even go to the manicure (pedicure) master.
I have listed several main signs by which you can understand a man and determine whether a man is watching himself more than usual or not. I repeat that this is not yet a 100% sign of Don Juan. You need to look at it in combination with other signs. However, at a minimum, this is a sign in order to take a closer look at the man and check him for compliance with other issues.
It is possible, of course, that work associated with constant communication and the need to influence people led a man to the need to pay attention to his appearance.
However, even in this case there is usually some discrepancy. For example, if there is a need to lead people, then good clothes (suit), hairstyle, confidence can be developed, but at the same time there may be a stomach, an uninflated figure, since this does not affect the ability to lead people. Speaking of how to become more confident, read the book "HOW TO BECOME CONFIDENT IN YOURSELF IN 3 MONTHS." The technique for developing confidence in this book is suitable for both guys and girls.
And vice versa, there may be sportiness due to the requirements of the job (law enforcement agencies, coach, etc.), but do not pay attention to the rest.
Don Juan, as a rule, pays attention to everything that is important for girls. (Depends, of course, on the level of Don Juan. There are hard workers, there are top managers, but the principle is the same).
I must say right away that if a man is married or has been married for a long time, then he can monitor his appearance quite well (or rather, his wife usually watches). So there is a good chance well-groomed man not Don Juan in the truest sense of the word, but simply married.
The second sign that will help you recognize Don Juan is smooth courtship, especially at the initial stage. (Introduction and first two dates)
I will probably not reveal a big secret to you if I say that the vast majority of men who even had a dozen or even more women before marriage are not very good at caring for women. What can we say about those ordinary guys who only had a few girls (or none at all).
After all, seduction and courtship are rarely taught anywhere. It is assumed that a guy or a man himself will somehow learn everything, just by talking with girls. And in principle it is justified to some extent.
It is "Somehow" the average guy, of which 90% knows how to care for a girl.
And if in detail:
First, he doesn't take care of his appearance. (What is above)
Secondly, during courtship, pauses constantly appear, the duration of which is clearly higher than the usual comfortable communication. This means that the man does not know what to say (or blurted out something, but did not work).
Thirdly, the man behaves like an idiot. That is, he tells completely idiotic stories. His anecdotes are not funny, his life stories are not interesting. He climbs to hug either too early or too late. He doesn't know how to compliment a girl. Maybe even show up on a first date without flowers.
Another thing is a person who has already mastered everything. This in our example can be just Don Juan-homegrown. (though not always)
Don Juan usually looks okay. But even this is not the main thing. The main thing is the smoothness of courtship.
Everything is worked out enough and therefore goes without pauses. There are funny stories (for women). A man knows how to present himself. He can give a good compliment. He can show that he is confident. It is clear that he will not come on a date without flowers or a gift.
I repeat that this sign (smoothness of courtship) cannot be considered separately from others. It is possible that a man from childhood had a pronounced sanguine character (he was very sociable, etc.)
But for the vast majority of ordinary men, the smoothness of courtship is not characteristic. Of course, later, as the girl and the guy get used to each other, as they have common topics for communication and knowledge of each other's character, the smoothness of communication will develop.
However, I'm talking more about the first meeting and at most the first two dates. If at the first meeting and on the first two dates the courtship of a man is skillful and everything goes like clockwork, then it is very likely that the man is a local Don Juan 
.
Once again I will repeat those signs by which one can judge the smoothness of courtship.
— The presence of almost a dating scenario on a first date. That is, a man does not mutter something indistinct like "What weather is good, so give me your phone", and can easily tell a story in a topic, chat, make you laugh and invite you on a date.
I repeat, an ordinary standard man will not do this without training. Depending on the age and experience of communicating with girls, he will mumble more or less, be stupid, be rude (sometimes without noticing it), look greedy (although not necessarily so).
— Well-established dating program.
The average man doesn't really know what to do on first dates. He offers either a movie, or a cafe, or go to his house, or something else. Don Juan has a more or less worked out program of action.
He is unlikely to invite you to visit his house and drink wine on the first date. (Unless the girl is really easy prey) He is unlikely to fuss with incomprehensible suggestions on how to spend a date (and then the cafe is closed, and there are no movie tickets).
He almost certainly has a program or, for the more experienced Don Juan, several programs of action. Everything worked out. He knows where to climb a skyscraper, he feels at home in nightclubs, he knows where to ride a boat with a girl. He knows what words and compliments you want to hear. (You can continue the list yourself)
- Worked out sequence of actions.
An ordinary man constantly gets lost in sequence. Then he is in too much of a hurry and tries to climb with his hands where it is not necessary. The girl is already ready, but he does nothing.
More or less experienced Don Juan does everything on time.
- Spent stories, anecdotes.
The fact is that even among relatively sociable men who do not pay attention to Don Juanism, conversations are tuned to men. Their stories and anecdotes are mostly funny to men.
And when these stories are told to girls, the girls do not laugh at least, but at most they can think that the man is at odds with the mind (if they don’t play along, of course, for some reason).
More experienced men who communicate a lot and successfully with girls remove from their repertoire those stories and anecdotes that are not funny to girls and do not arouse their interest.
Therefore, if all or almost all the stories of a man arouse interest and laughter in you (as well as nearby girls), then it is likely that Don Juan is in front of you.
So, the smoothness of courtship is one of the best signs of Don Juan homegrown. If you know how to recognize this smoothness, you will easily identify Don Juan.
I'll make a little analogy. For example, several men gathered and began to throw a basketball into the basket. Someone does not hit at all (an inexperienced man, in our analogy), someone hits better. And suddenly you see that there is a man who hits the basket with the ball almost always, in different positions, from afar and close.
It is clear that this man is engaged in basketball and quite intensively. After all, no one has an innate skill of hitting the ball into the basket.
So it is in the relationship between a man and a woman. There are no men with innate good wooing skills. If suddenly you see such a man, it means that he learned such skills somewhere. Where is the question? Of course, you can improve such a skill in some psychology courses or by practicing in front of a mirror. However, a good skill can only be achieved through caring for a large number of women and some sort of practice, analysis of the skill. (Don Juan in fact)
Do not think that I recommend that you definitely meet a man who has no skills in communicating with girls at all. This can be quite tricky and can get boring soon. But too good skills, smooth courtship is a strong sign that a man is Don Juan.
Look for other signs. If they are present to one degree or another, then this is not even an assumption, but almost a 100% conclusion.
One of the main signs of Don Juan is that they are psychologically immature.. (either infantile or hard manipulative)
But without this sign, all of the above may not indicate that the man is Don Juan, but that he is under an excess of hormones (youth or even at an older age), that he is due to something (innate beauty, confidence, money) too spoiled by women, but not Don Juan. That is, you can make a mistake, sometimes costly, based on only two signs.
Therefore, I suggest that you first think about whether your man you know has the first two signs. (too much attention to their appearance, the smoothness of courtship). Only then can we look at psychological immaturity.
How to distinguish between extremely infantile men and men prone to harsh manipulation, you can read in separate articles. How to recognize a male manipulator and what to do? And How to spot a manipulator? (Part 2)
But in a nutshell, it could be:
- Excessive selfishness.
That is, a man does not want (cannot) do anything for you. He does not listen to what you say to him (pretends to listen, and then again about his own). He only spends money on himself.
— Unethical, manifested in one form or another.
— Dependence on someone.
“Obvious avoidance of even minor help to the girl. (For example, he is immediately busy as soon as he needs help to do something)
On this, perhaps, we can finish.
Let's sum up a little. Don Juans are those men with whom, due to the peculiarities of their psyche, it is almost impossible to build normal long-term relationships. Even if the girl is the best, is well versed in the psychology of men, the most beautiful and smartest, then this will not stop the real Don Juan. (No matter how much you feed the wolf, he still looks into the forest). The maximum that you can do is to identify them in time and refuse to communicate with him.
Sincerely, Rashid Kirranov.
Why is a woman raising children, cooking, washing, ironing, keeping the house in order, working, looking good, etc. etc., but does a man EARN MONEY? And on this, in fact, his direct duties somehow seem to end. I will not stomp my feet, wave my arms and shout loudly “Give equal rights!”. But where is the simple and natural, in my opinion, desire to support and help a loved one, take on some of these tedious household chores?
I asked this question out loud, and my girlfriends asked. We never received a clear answer, except for “I make money” and “I get tired at work,” from our men.
I am ready to understand and accept this state of affairs, but I would like to hear clear arguments. After all, a woman also gets tired at work and also earns money. And if a woman is a housewife, she cannot take a break from her housework even on weekends, and no one will give her vacation.
I would very much like to teach some men to help their beautiful halves to restore and maintain order. But I'm sure THIS IS USELESS, because the female idea of order is significantly different from the male vision of this problem.
It seems to me that we can teach a small child to put things in order, to be neat, to appreciate comfort and cleanliness, because kids are just tasting the world, they are just forming an idea of \u200b\u200bbeautiful and ugly, bad and good, right and wrong. We instill in them the concept of how we think it should be, and teach them to build their lives, their actions and their relationships in such a way as to achieve these ideals.
An adult man has already formed a holistic picture of the world, connections, concepts. An adult man lives his life according to this picture. Therefore, the most senseless occupation is to re-educate and remake a man. So, do not wait for that happy moment (or maybe not very happy) when a man learns to put things in order and maintain order.
Sometimes it seems to me that the ability to scatter socks is transmitted through the male line as a kind of hereditary disease, or that a father teaches his growing son this in a confidential half-whisper.
Unfortunately, the tendency to mess is not limited to scattered socks. As soon as a certain object ceases to be of value, the man leaves it right there, without even bothering to think that it would be nice to put this object in place. Some men manage to create complete chaos out of nothing. Immediately make a reservation, NOT ALL, but according to my observations, very many.
At the beginning of a life together, such flaws seem quite harmless, and most girls hope that they will definitely teach their man to maintain the order created by them, the girls. Some even naively believe that their man is not like that at all. And men even honestly try to live up to expectations. But, it is impossible to live up to anyone's expectations all your life.
If you make a list of the reasons why women put things in order, it becomes obvious why this, in principle, cannot be expected from a man:
In the view of a man, it is useful for him to go to the bathhouse and fully relax in front of a TV or computer, and it is useful for children to spend time with their grandmothers in the country. And clean air is not a vitamin, and it is difficult to assess the purity of air without special devices.
Reasons for pride and for “boasting” among men are more significant than our properly organized dressing room and clean baseboard.
I personally see only three options for the development of events:
I would call the first option the most wise. Although personally I am more satisfied with the third, and periodically - the second.
The fact that men are not as “decent” as women has its advantages, however, quite a bit: if a man is not so clean, he is unlikely to notice our small flaws and mess if we suddenly didn’t have time or didn’t wanted to do.
Congratulate your wonderful men on the holiday! Learn to see their best qualities in them, as it was at the very beginning of your acquaintance!
Our beloved, smart, strong, reliable men who know how to cheer and please us, always remain the same! Just put your dirty socks in the laundry basket, please, at least sometimes!
It is possible to distinguish a fake from gold, it is easy to identify a counterfeit bill, but it is much more difficult to recognize a person. But if you have clear criteria for what should be a real man, then, having got to know him better, you will definitely say who invited you on a date: a fake or a nugget.
Any woman dreams of seeing a real man next to her, some kind of prince on a white horse or a knight in armor. But the fabulous image does not always coincide with reality, and you can run into anyone. But girls really want to meet the ideal candidate for life partners.
In this article we will tell you about what it means In other words, what qualities a representative of the strong half of humanity should have, according to women.
Perhaps the most important quality. After all, it is precisely this that reveals the essence of a man, combining in him courage, honor, nobility, and the one who possesses this quality is very close to the image of his own ancestors.
According to women, a man should be responsible. Of course, in ancient times this was easier. He killed the beast, brought the prey and again run to hunt - this was the working day of our distant ancestor. Everything seems to be very simple, not like in modern world where a man has to bear a much greater responsibility. It is necessary not only to protect and feed your family, but also to “turn on” your head in certain situations. And this is a rather difficult task.
There are people who say one thing and do something completely different. And there are men who refuse words for the sake of self-interest. You can't do that. If he gave his word, he will keep it, even if it does not bring him benefits. These representatives of the stronger sex will always be valued and respected.
A man should be doubly brave: for himself and for his companion. It is unacceptable to hide behind the backs of their mothers and wives.
Not all representatives of the stronger sex have this quality. Most lie even to their wives. Of course, you can deceive others, but definitely not yourself. The main thing is to be honest with yourself.
We can say that it is synonymous with honesty. It is a very rare quality among the male population. It is unlikely that you can find 100% somewhere. After all, he must protect, feed and love his own family, not cheat on his wife, respect the elderly, not commit bad deeds, never cheat, etc. This image is too utopian. And if you meet such a man, then you can put him in a museum as a valuable and rare antique.
This quality should be inherent in every member of the stronger sex, especially if you have your own family. Without a good attitude, it is impossible to engage in the upbringing of children. Of course, this does not stop some, but what will come of their offspring in the future?
The main sign of kindness is respect for old age and love for animals. In general, in order to find out the “true” face of a man, you need to find out how he relates to “striped and mustachioed”. Also pay attention to how he speaks of his own parents or grandparents.
This is one of the qualities that reflect the essence of a man. It closely echoes the responsibility, which we wrote about above. A man should not be lazy, because he is the source of resources (money) for his family. In addition, there are many household chores that a woman is not able to cope with. You have to be a man and help your chosen one, and not lie on the couch with a can of beer and watch TV.
One of the most important qualities. Any man should know what he wants to achieve and It can be different areas: hobbies, sports, career, work. If there is no goal, then the man simply goes with the flow, and all his free time is consumed by surfing the Internet, watching TV, drinking, lying on the couch, etc.
In general, it is very difficult to live without it, and it is also quite difficult to conquer a woman, resolve a delicate situation, etc. In modern reality, a sense of humor is not just important, it is vital. As one satirist said: "If it weren't so funny, it would be scary."
For many women, it is the mind that reflects the essence of a man. If it is not enough, then it is unlikely that a person will make a good head of the family. Raising children, solving household issues, earning money - all this fully or partially falls on men's shoulders. And in the organization and calculations of all this, the mind plays a paramount role.
Many people believe that men should never be attracted by their appearance. This is an erroneous opinion. Certainly they should! But this is not about but about real male sexuality and attractiveness, when a woman walking next to her feels both safe and pleasant.
Although it is not so developed in men, nevertheless, each of them should have some kind of sixth sense, suggesting that a woman needs help. The main task of the representative of the stronger sex is to console, protect, help in difficult times, or just be there.
A well-known actor in his interview said: "I do not divide housework into men's and women's. If necessary, I can sew on a button, and wash, and cook, and change a child's diaper." That's what a man can be! And this is absolutely normal. Moreover, it should be so. If earlier women were engaged exclusively in household chores, now they work on an equal basis with men. And they can also be late at work. Therefore, a real man will not tell his wife who has returned after a hard day that he is too tired and will not do anything.
In the high rhythm of modern life, a man simply must be mobile and mobile. Sitting in one place, you can not feed yourself or your own family. And only parasites and lazy people sit in their pants.
Many women answer the question “what is the essence of a man”: “independence”. That is, in the ability to solve absolutely any problems without anyone's help.
This does not mean metrosexuals, who, apart from their appearance, do not care about anything. We are talking about the elementary rules of personal hygiene and minimal care for your appearance. Remember, people always meet by clothes.
A man must have unbreakable principles on any issue. Otherwise, he will either become henpecked, or already is.
At the moment, this quality is more typical for swan relationships than for human ones. Although ideally every man should be devoted.
To parents, chosen one, children, acquaintances, relatives and not only. Love for others and the whole world ... because without it it is difficult to live and be in harmony with oneself.
So, the essence of a man is expressed in the presence of the qualities listed above. Although they are not a panacea. After all, every woman has her own understanding of what a real man should be.
