Without suffering, it is impossible to feel the taste of life, learn to appreciate it and enjoy every little thing. Tests build character, give impetus to creative development, form sensitivity to understanding the experiences of other people, but every time, faced with the loss of a relationship, everyone asks a question, Psychology comes to the rescue, giving advice to accept the current situation.
Even the most tender and sincere relationship can end because human feelings are fickle and not always amenable to reasonable explanation. When people are in love or blinded by passion, they are uncritical to everyday problems that arise, the difference in education, perception of life, and the shortcomings of their partner. It is impossible to build something lasting and durable on feelings alone, which means that one must be prepared for the fact that they will end sooner or later. Various studies "give" passion from three to eight years. It should be replaced by mutual respect, cooperation, intimacy.
But no one is immune from the fact that one of the partners will not flare up new feelings for another person, or he will not begin to feel discomfort in the existing relationship. It is easier for the one who first fell out of love or the first to decide to leave. And a loved one to someone who was not ready for such a development of events, whose feelings are still alive, because it is impossible to stop loving at the same time by magic. The first and most important step to be taken is to recognize the right of everyone to make their own choices and make their own decisions. It is impossible to keep a person close to you by appealing to his promises, past confessions and a sense of duty.
And the common expression "fight for love" has nothing to do with putting pressure on a partner. It is rather a call for the manifestation of one's own feelings, so that a person has an understanding that he is loved. But it will be up to him to decide how important it is for him.
At the very beginning of the relationship, there is always the opportunity to interrupt them if one of the partners does not see the prospects for their development. Vulnerable people, with low self-esteem and fear of loneliness, often get involved in such novels. Instead of developing - working on appearance, intellect, professional career - a person rushes towards an adventurous development of events. There will be no question of how to get a person out of your head if you stop in time. Unpromising relationships can be a conscious choice of both: resort or love affair at work, purely sexual connection, mutual use of each other (teacher-student, leader-subordinate).
This does not insure against the fact that one of the partners will not fall into psychological dependence and will not suffer after the breakup. There are examples when such relationships develop into real feelings, but this is always a risk that a person takes quite consciously. However, there are times when this happens unconsciously, if one of the parties stubbornly ignores the signs of a hopeless relationship, which should be highlighted:
When parting, a person should be prepared for the fact that it is impossible to leave the relationship with a joyful smile. He has to go through everything that is akin to the departure of a loved one from life, because now he really has to live without the previous format of communication. What are these stages?
One of the main human misconceptions is the assertion that time heals. Just as it is impossible to jump over important stages of mourning, it is impossible not to be sad in the depths of the soul about the loss of a once loved one. This is another reason not to do dubious experiments on yourself when you get involved in a relationship without a future. But time teaches everyone to overcome pain and store it in the deep stores of the soul, allowing a person to live and fulfill his needs. Even when close relatives pass away, acute pain dulls and fades into the background after a period of six months to a year.
The second misconception is that a wedge can only be knocked out with a wedge, which means that it is necessary to rush into a new relationship as soon as possible. First, it's not fair to a partner who acts like a pill and doesn't deserve to be used just because someone else is in pain. And secondly, it is dishonest in relation to oneself: without going through all the stages of mourning, without making the necessary conclusions about the reasons for parting, a person will constantly step on the same rake, again solving the problem of how to get a person out of his head.
Relief will come only when the partner manages to accept the current situation and come to terms with the decision of the other side. What hinders this the most? Paradoxical as it may seem, hope, belief that something else can be changed, corrected the situation, replayed events, words, deeds. If the partner has a gentle character, he gives a second chance, then a third, but as a result, both waste time, nerves and destroy their own personality. Often, with this decision, the second side allows the first one to “fall in love” and cope with parting to the detriment of their own interests and feelings. The first became easier, and the second appears aggression and hatred for the one who simply took advantage of him. After all, it is always easier to leave yourself than to be in the role of an abandoned one.
How to get a loved one out of your head so as not to sow destruction and hatred around you? Respect the decision of the partner and do not try to look for the culprit in the breakup. Feelings go away not because someone is better, but someone is worse. This is because the two are uncomfortable in the relationship. You should not reflect on the topic "if only ..." and rush into the past. You should focus on what needs to be changed in the future.
The destruction of a relationship is always the responsibility of two. People were unable or unwilling to overcome difficulties and misunderstanding. Resentment is a childish reaction to unfulfilled expectations, but a partner cannot be held responsible for not fully meeting other people's expectations. When falling in love passes and rose-colored glasses fall off, everyone is free to decide whether he is on his way with this person or not. The inability to accept him as he is is not love, but human selfishness and personal ambition. A partner always has a choice: stay or leave. To stay means to accept a person with all his shortcomings.
During a romantic relationship, everyone tries to look better than he really is, so you need to be more attentive to those moments, how a person behaves with other people. If from previous relationships he comes out behaving in an unworthy way, you can predict what will happen when his feelings for a new passion cool down. To overcome grievances, one should not stir up the past, the main motto should be the slogan "Do not remember." The first step towards this is the refusal to find the culprit in the destruction of the relationship.
Memories overwhelm us when there are pauses in our activities. The best thing is to switch to work, hobbies or further education. The main condition is that the business is loved and requires dedication. The day must be planned so that there is no time left for idle pastime. If a vacation is coming that cannot be rescheduled, it is best to go on a trip. New impressions excite the brain and evoke positive emotions, which are so necessary when you have to find the answer to the question of how to get a person out of your head.
Music that has a therapeutic effect helps a lot. Be sure to plan concerts of your favorite bands, make videos for their best songs, discuss the new album released on the forum. All this is possible subject to the main condition - getting rid of the hope of a phone call, a change in the decision or mood of a loved one. It can happen, but let it be a surprise when life shows how partners can do without each other. And then the decision will be made by the one who was left. In the meantime, you should delete the correspondence and stop looking for answers to today's questions in past words.
At the first stage, it can be difficult for a person to simply get out of bed and leave the house. I want to be alone and cry. This is fine. How else can you forget the person you love? Psychology describes cases when the process is delayed, and people lose control of the situation. At these moments, you need the help of friends who should be contacted. They are not only able to listen and support a friend, but also help organize leisure time without leaving unnecessary free time. True friends will not make a decision for a person, giving this or that advice, but will focus on which suffers in the first place.
There is an opinion that you should get rid of all things that remind you of the once loving person. Sometimes it is quite painful to do this, so you can just put everything in one box or box, put it away. Time heals to the extent that after a certain period the acute phase of pain passes, and a person is able to make a decision not on emotions whether to wear a bracelet that was once presented or not. In many ways, this will depend on whether the partner has found the strength in himself not only to accept the situation, but also to forgive the other person.
In a few months anyone will be able to ask themselves main question: what upsets him the most in parting. Love is not always the cause of experiences. It can be resentment, disappointment, fear of loneliness or a desire to achieve what you want at any cost - to return a partner, for example. At this time, it is already possible to abandon the “Do not remember” rule, because turning to the past will not bring painful experiences. An honest conversation with yourself is very important in order to be ready to build new relationships, to draw the right conclusions from past mistakes. The last step should be to forgive the once loved person, for this you need to try to put yourself in his place.
In psychology, there is a method called the Hellinger permutation method, which helps in building relationships between spouses. One of the principles is an attempt to analyze the actions and feelings of a partner. The method leads to an amazing discovery: even a partner who has fallen out of love, skillfully hiding his true feelings behind a mask of indifference or indifference, feels discomfort and dissatisfaction with himself in his soul. It was also painful and difficult for him to decide to part, so the other person has no choice but to forgive and forget the person with whom he simply turned out to be on the wrong path in this life. Moreover, forgiveness is needed not so much for a partner as for oneself in order to doom the necessary harmony and peace.
Only after going all this way, a person is ready for the happiness that awaits him around the corner.
There is not a single person who has not been touched by unhappy love at least once in his life, therefore, everyone knows firsthand how partings go. Many endure this easily and painlessly, while others suffer for years, not understanding why life did this to them. When all traditional methods have been exhausted, one has to resort to heavy artillery. A conspiracy to forget a person is especially popular. Its effectiveness amazes even non-believers.
Spell to forget a loved one
Believe in yourself and life will believe in you. Magic exists, and it is able to correct the most difficult situation. A conspiracy to forget - does it really exist or not?
In order to forget the one who left you, time alone is not always enough. Deep resentment, a strong blow, unrequited love - all this can "live" in a person for a long time. A conspiracy to forget thanks to which anyone can be helped to alleviate suffering, for example, a son may not remember his mother.
The power of a conspiracy is in words that have a miraculous effect on life. Thanks to words, you can forever get rid of someone who, it would seem, forever settled in your heart: a husband, boyfriend, wife, just a loved one. Not everyone can endure a difficult breakup, because the grievances left by a former lover do not go away with a breath of wind.
Conspiracies can be presented in various forms. All that is required of you is a strong desire and desire for the release of the heart after parting. If you are really ready to join new life and start from scratch, then get ready for the fact that it remains to wait just a little bit more. A conspiracy to forget the one you sincerely love must be uttered from a person with pure intentions and thoughts. Try to let go of resentment for a while, and then they will let you go forever.
Turning to magic for help, you should be prepared for the fact that the result may appear in a few days, or even after several rituals. There are many different options.
Each conspiracy is different in that it can help any person who has been offended. No matter how strong past love was, magic will help you get rid of its destructive power.
In the world of magic and miracles, conspiracies and rituals from Stepanova, who has an enviable skill in love affairs, are considered famous.
You have to read on a waning moon to forget. It is suitable for any life incident, after which you have unpleasant sensations: “Almighty powers, help me forget all past hurtful insults, the worst evil and angry anger. It may be very difficult for me, but I believe that everything is possible.
To forget the one who died: the best remedy. It is not always only partings that are hard to endure by a person, very often people cannot come to terms with the death of loved ones. We offer you a way that will ease the pain of a loved one and help you move on. It is enough to say these words three nights in a row:
“Star is clear, star is sweet, take my sorrows to the distant distances. Relieve me of intense anxiety and worry. Let (name) leave me, but life goes on, and from now on I have peace of mind. Bless and save. Amen!".
You can forget the woman who hurt you, or the mother who left you, the ungrateful daughter, using the following method:
As you can see, in order to recover after parting, it is not enough to wait until a miracle happens - you need to act on your own. No matter how much pain a man or woman causes you, remember that you can handle it. Love yourself, and then you can stop loving any scoundrel.
Love is an important part of any person's life. We strive to get it in the family, friends, pets, and so we dream of finding a soul mate. But in addition to happiness, it also gives pain and disappointment. After the breakup of a relationship, echoes of all those feelings and a strong burden often remain. Reconciliation and convergence is no longer possible. Then the person suffers, tries by all means to get out of this abyss of despair and forget about love. To help move forward without wasting time on depression, to help meet a new guy or girl with an open heart, a conspiracy of magic and prayer will help to forget a person.
To stop loving a person forever, you need to do the following:
If the ritual does not help, does not cleanse the soul completely, repeat it again seven days later. Indeed, in the occultism, lemon balm means enlightenment and purification, and among the people it is also called heart joy.
There is another small ritual.
In magic, poppy is used to create amulets; it absorbs energy well. So here it will be in place:Using psychological techniques, do not forget that magic is a conversation with the universe through conspiracies, rituals and other magical actions. But the universe understands everything through its signs and the power of thought.
In the Tarot there is a Major Arcana 13 Death. For you, such a card is terrible, dark, oppressive. But for the world, death is the withering away of the old in order to create a new one on its ashes. By letting go of dead relationships from yourself, from your soul, you give a signal that you are ready to build new ones. If you cannot handle this on your own, reach out to the mighty universe with special signals, with all your heart and desire. Then she will come to your aid.
It is worth noting that prayers in order to forget the pain of love and a loved one do not exist as such. But in Christianity there are Saints who are worth turning to even for such sensitive questions. After all, their life was full of various events, and they focused on various things. For example, refer to the patron saints of lovers:
Why should one turn to the patrons of love and lovers if the problem is related to separation? Because you need to forgive and leave the past, thank you for all the good things that happened and ask you to meet a new, worthy person. Guide you along this path and give you strength.
Say that in the morning after waking up, you cleanse yourself and wash yourself with water, dry yourself and go beyond the threshold. There you go through the field, and come to the river, where the board lies, and under it is your longing. That it depresses you, life takes away and sadness floods the white light. Say that the water is consecrated by the Mother of God herself, it washes away evil from you and cleanses your soul. May she continue to wash you, the Servant of God (name). Let it carry away all grievances with a strong stream and bury them at the bottom, so much so that no one else finds and lacks. Everything is locked up with a lock, and hidden in all parts of the world.
After that, you should bow to all four cardinal points.
To fall out of love is well suited ostuda. This is a conspiracy that helps to forget a person and cool all previous feelings. It can also be used on rivals in a relationship. But you still have to pay for this, because you get into someone else's life and fate, and retribution always comes for this. Therefore, the best way out is to cool yourself and your feelings.
On the waning moon:A strong conspiracy to get rid of thoughts about the former and get rid of memories.
Take a photo of a person, put them upside down on a table or other flat surface. Place a glass of water next to it, and a piece of black bread on it. The plot is spoken for a week three times a day. Every day you need to put a fresh piece of bread, and give the previous one to the birds.
Then a conspiracy. Say that you no longer mention the former with love, let him remain in his place, as you forgot your first step, so forget him. Amen.
May everything go well in your life, whether magic, prayer, a conspiracy to forget a person or something else will help in this, being happy is all in your hands.
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Conspiracy how to forget a loved one
How to get rid of longing for a loved one after parting, this question is asked by many who had to leave, but love remained and does not give rest for a minute. Even in ancient times, love anguish and boredom were removed with the help of conspiracies, and it is very good that it was this magical conspiracy that helped to forget a loved one on the same day. You should not torment yourself and torment your heart by tormenting him with memories of someone who no longer needs you, you don’t know how to forget your loved one and live a happy life, read one of the conspiracies below and believe that you will still meet your true love, and the one whom you will soon forget may soon want to return, but it is up to you to give him a second chance and wait for another reason to part.
What conspiracies help to forget a loved one very quickly? Read and choose the one that is easier for you to do at home, this is the most complete selection of the strongest conspiracies will help you quickly forget the person you love.
It’s impossible to forget a person three times at sunrise for three days in a row before going to bed, read this strong conspiracy that will help you forget love and cool love longing. After reading the text from memory four times, cross yourself with bows to all four sides. The words of the conspiracy that will help you forget your loved one you need to read on your own:
I get up early in the morning, wash my face with clean water,
I wipe myself with a white towel, I go out the new gate,
Through the open field to the river I go.
That river is deep, and there is a wide board in it.
Under that board lies my longing,
She stings me like a snake, she drinks my blood,
Doesn't let me sleep at night, sends demons, torments my soul.
You, water-voditsa, sister of the Mother of God,
Helper to the Lady herself,
Wash away from me, servants of God (name), filthy melancholy.
You take her with you, wash her with crystal jets,
Take it away with a stormy stream, drag it into a dark pool,
Bury it at the very bottom so that no one can get it out of there.
Put melancholy on the castle, lock it on four sides,
Bury the key on the holy throne.
No one can get that key, and the servant of God (name) does not yearn.
As soon as you are seized by longing for your beloved, quickly say the words of the conspiracy six times and the longing will recede:
Serpent of the heart - get out, get out.
Dispel your will in the wind.
The heart does not toil, the soul does not grieve,
According to the slave (name), do not burn with fire.
Crawl the snake into your lair.
There you will be, there you will live,
And I, (my name), do not love a person (his name) forever,
don't want, don't wait, don't know
neither in thought, nor in heart, nor in hearing, nor in spirit.
I snake like a snake, but I have my own side.
For this magical rite, you will need a photo of the person you want to forget. Turn it upside down and put it on the table in this form. Then fill a glass of water, cover it with a piece of black bread on top and place it in front of the photo. The plot must be read seven days in a row, three times. Change the bread every day (give the old one to the birds) and pour the water out the window. The words of the conspiracy that you need to read in order to quickly and forever forget a person after parting:
Slave (name), stand as you stand. Bread, lie down as you lie.
I will remember you not with love, but with cold blood.
How I, (my name), forgot how I walked the first steps in childhood,
As my first tooth grew.
So from now on and until the age to forget me this man, slave (name).
For the ceremony, you need to take some ice water pre-chilled in the refrigerator. In the room where you will read a conspiracy to help you forget your ex with closed doors and curtained curtains, put water in front of you and slowly, carefully pronouncing each word, say this strong conspiracy twice on your own:
Mother Voditsa, sister of the well.
Everyone who comes to you will drink cold water.
In the bath they pour you over, the dead wash themselves with you.
Oh, mother water, icy shores, cool down the servant of God (name),
So that she cools down to the servant of God (name),
I didn’t know sadness for him, I didn’t tear my heart.
If he had disliked her, he would have become ashamed of her.
She would close the doors from him, would not let his feet on the threshold, would not run to see him.
Mother well water, your icy shores, I bow to the ground.
Cool the heart of the servant of God (name).
Rise my word to the Lord, descend on the heart of the servant of God (name).
I lock my plot with three locks, I close my business with three keys.
Drink the spoken water, wash yourself with it and sprinkle your clothes in which you walk.
In the morning, wash yourself with river water, which should be collected against the current. At the same time, read the words of the conspiracy:
Oh, you, yellow sand, fast river,
Take away my longing for God's servant (name),
So that I don't grieve anymore
And I no longer yearned
Not a day in the sun
With a high bright star.
How she doesn't miss anyone
Never mourns for anyone
So that I don't suffer
Hurry up the servant of God (name) forgot.
Strong weight loss conspiracies Those who want to quickly lose weight and find a beautiful figure will be helped by these strong weight loss conspiracies that need to be read on water and the waning moon. If you independently conduct one of the simple magical rituals for weight loss and rapid weight loss, then very soon your weight will decline and will not return. Let's not lose
Protect yourself from the evil eye and damage, ways to protect yourself and your baby from the evil eye and damage in everyday life. IN modern world malice and envy, people bring damage and evil eye on each other without even realizing it, and our magazine will tell you today how to protect yourself from such influence in the modern world. The following ways to protect yourself and your child from evil people deliberately suggestive
How to independently remove damage from yourself You can independently remove damage from yourself or another person at home, but the most effective way is a church or on the banks of a river. If you perform a magical rite to remove the induced damage correctly, then the result will come very quickly, but still it is best to go to church even after removing the damage, which will finally help
A STRONG CONSPIRACY TO RETURN A LOVED PERSON The action of the conspiracy to return and admonish is very strong and begins immediately after it is carried out. Wherever the beloved is, even in another city, he will have a strong desire to see you and will not disappear until he returns to you. This conspiracy is very great strength and capable so much
Strong conspiracies for love melancholy to read on their own Girls will never stop reading conspiracies that bring love melancholy to their beloved husband or man so that he misses and yearns and in every possible way seeks an opportunity to meet his beloved who read a conspiracy to him for strong melancholy. If you decide to bewitch your beloved so that he “dries” and yearns for you and get married
DRYING YOUR LOVED ON YOUR OWN You don’t know how to bewitch a husband or a man without harm, make a quick and simple drying, but we’ll tell you how to do it now. Prushka for the love of your loved one is done on a candy, which then you need to treat the man on whom you do not want to make a strong love spell. To successfully complete the magic ritual, you will need to treat
HOW TO RETURN YOUR WIFE HOME WITH A SPELL LOVE AND PRAYER If your wife has left you, you can return her by any of the methods described below and all of them have an almost 100% magical effect if the above method is performed correctly, you just have to choose and read a love spell or prayer for the return of your wife which will quickly make her return to you even from a very rich
LOVE ANOTHER'S HUSBAND Attention: this love spell is suitable only to bewitch someone else's husband to yourself. If you are ready to take on such a sin and destroy someone else's happiness (a wife can love her husband very much and not know about his betrayals, there can also be children in the family), this love spell using a conspiracy and a love decoction will help break the family and bewitch to
A conspiracy to call or write If your beloved man or boyfriend has stopped coming in and does not write to call and in every way avoids meeting you, a strong conspiracy will help so that the right person calls you urgently, and this conspiracy works very quickly. This conspiracy must be read in order to force a loved one to call, write or come to the person called by him. This
SPELL FOR THE RETURN OF THE LOVED ONE This love spell is read independently if the husband or beloved man left home for his mistress. A strong conspiracy will very quickly return a walking man to his own family and will be able to cool feelings for another woman. A love spell to return a loved one belongs to black magic, therefore it is very important not to go to church and not pray for three days during the ceremony
LOVE SPELL TO MAKE A LOVED ONE How to get married? Years go by and no one makes a marriage proposal, which means it's time for you to do something. If you already have a beloved boyfriend or adult man, make this easy but very strong and effective love spell for your beloved to marry. A love spell guarantees that your loved one will not only reciprocate your feelings, but
How to make a love spell?
How to remove a spell? The site will tell
LOVE LOVE SPELLS AND SPELLS FOR EVERYONE.
In life, sometimes we have to deal with unrequited love, with love for a person who does not deserve it or with whom, for very specific reasons, we cannot get a relationship. This makes the question relevant: how to forget it?
A good place to start is to ask yourself: Do I really want to forget him? Is this my final decision? If not, the question is gone. If you have made an irrevocable decision to rid yourself of this addiction, then you have to work hard. Is it a joke to kill such a wonderful feeling, which is elevated by many to the rank of spiritual, superhuman and unique, something that is not given to everyone, that subjugates many to its will for many years?
Despite the difficulties that arise for any person who is faced with the need to “forget”, this can be done. Let's discuss the ways that will help you fall out of love and find peace of mind.
Dealing with the cause.
There is a possibility that a person, by his presence next to you, performed an important function, helped to satisfy some urgent need, and therefore was chosen by you. Perhaps this is a need for attention, for the security that he could provide, for sharing responsibility in your life, for justifying your behavior or thinking style (if he “alone” understood you in some way) - there are a lot of options.
Think, could this be? If yes, then you should listen to yourself and find other ways to satisfy the same need. For example, you can seek love and understanding from friends, make new acquaintances if the circle of current friends is limited and cannot give you what you need now. In general, try during this period of your life to communicate with people as much as possible, not to withdraw into yourself. After all, the needs associated with people can only be satisfied with the help of people.
Change of thinking.
According to the theory of cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy, the emotions experienced by a person are based on incorrect thinking, inadequate to reality. Hence the conclusion: in order to change feelings and emotions, you need to change the very style of thinking, work with unproductive thoughts that arise - replace them with more realistic ones.
For example, thoughts of obligation (“I must love / be loved!”, “I must have a partner!”) should be replaced with thoughts of preference (“I would like to have a partner, but I don’t have to at all”, “It would be nice to love / to be loved”, etc.). This will reduce the degree of expression of emotion and bring it closer to one that will be adequate to the situation.
Often a person falls in love not with a real partner, but with his idealized image, so our main task is to bring this image closer to the real one. This can be done by finding serious shortcomings in a person, searching for his psychological problems. Your task is to deromanticize the image of your loved one.
Is he so beautiful? Everyone has flaws, that's the way we are. Try to find as many of these flaws as possible and focus on them when thoughts about him enter your head. Some psychologists propose to deromanticize the image of a person, presenting him in ridiculous situations: for example, defecating, or in a clown hat and family shorts in front of an audience, or with female makeup on a serious face.
Mental pronunciation of the reasons for the impossibility of being together also helps to cope with love. Imagine what would really happen to you if you got married: exaggerate in the area where you come across unpleasant moments (betrayal, late coming home, habits that are unpleasant for you, etc.).
Some believe that in order to stop loving a person, you need to forget him and everything connected with him. In this article, I present a different position - do not forget! This is a part of your life, your invaluable experience, which is not so easy to forget, and it is not necessary. What to do with her? To work through, re-evaluate, take a fresh look at this complex, but such an important experience. Any experience in one way or another can be useful.
At the same time, after you have been able to process this experience, try to think about it less often. As soon as you feel that the thought of this person creeps up again - stop it in the bud! Immediately change the topic of the internal monologue, do something that requires you to have a good concentration of attention so that you cannot be distracted by thinking about it.
The end result of your inner work should be the following: it is necessary, despite all his shortcomings, to forgive and mentally let go of this person. This set point will complete an important period of your life, and you will be able to start a new one - a stage without this person. It is the feeling of inner incompleteness that haunts us and brings back in memory the painful experience of communicating with the object of love.
Change in behavior and environment.
The internal work with thoughts should be supported by the external - a change in behavior and the creation of favorable external conditions for parting with love. Remove or throw away his things, stop looking for something that reminds you of him and his life. Stop looking for meetings with him, try to completely exclude any contacts if possible. No wonder the famous proverb says: “Out of sight, out of mind!”
Sports and other active activities (dancing, martial arts, etc.) will help you get rid of the accumulated negative emotions, aggression and simply will not let your tone fall, which means that they will protect you to some extent from possible depression. Maintain your mood. Keep your spirits up, think positive, listen to upbeat music, have fun and go to events with friends.
When a relationship breaks down, time and space in the heart are always freed up. They need to be occupied with other things, and certainly interesting: new or long-forgotten, but joyful activities, interests, hobbies.
Folk wisdom again rushes to our aid: "The wedge is knocked out with a wedge." New relationships, new feelings - this is what can irrevocably crowd out old hopes and pain. The main thing to remember at the same time: you should not look for a person who looks like a former lover. This will create a risk of unnecessary memories of him or you will again step on the same rake - why do you need this?
Time is a good doctor. It will pass, and you will suddenly feel that you are now thinking less and less about this person, feelings are slowly cooling down and bothering you less. Thank yourself for the work you were able to do. And with relief, put a fat point!
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In life, sometimes we have to deal with unrequited love, with love for a person who does not deserve it or with whom, for very specific reasons, we cannot get a relationship. This makes the question relevant: how to forget it?
A good place to start is to ask yourself: Do I really want to forget him? Is this my final decision? If not, the question is gone. If you have made an irrevocable decision to rid yourself of this addiction, then you have to work hard. Is it a joke to kill such a wonderful feeling, which is elevated by many to the rank of spiritual, superhuman and unique, something that is not given to everyone, that subjugates many to its will for many years?
Despite the difficulties that arise for any person who is faced with the need to “forget”, this can be done. Let's discuss the ways that will help you fall out of love and find peace of mind.
Dealing with the cause.
There is a possibility that a person, by his presence next to you, performed an important function, helped to satisfy some urgent need, and therefore was chosen by you. Perhaps this is a need for attention, for the security that he could provide, for sharing responsibility in your life, for justifying your behavior or thinking style (if he “alone” understood you in some way) - there are a lot of options.
Think, could this be? If yes, then you should listen to yourself and find other ways to satisfy the same need. For example, you can seek love and understanding from friends, make new acquaintances if the circle of current friends is limited and cannot give you what you need now. In general, try during this period of your life to communicate with people as much as possible, not to withdraw into yourself. After all, the needs associated with people can only be satisfied with the help of people.
Change of thinking.
According to the theory of cognitive-behavioral psychotherapy, the emotions experienced by a person are based on incorrect thinking, inadequate to reality. Hence the conclusion: in order to change feelings and emotions, you need to change the very style of thinking, work with unproductive thoughts that arise - replace them with more realistic ones.
For example, thoughts of obligation (“I must love / be loved!”, “I must have a partner!”) should be replaced with thoughts of preference (“I would like to have a partner, but I don’t have to at all”, “It would be nice to love / to be loved”, etc.). This will reduce the degree of expression of emotion and bring it closer to one that will be adequate to the situation.
Often a person falls in love not with a real partner, but with his idealized image, so our main task is to bring this image closer to the real one. This can be done by finding serious shortcomings in a person, searching for his psychological problems. Your task is to deromanticize the image of your loved one.
Is he so beautiful? Everyone has flaws, that's the way we are. Try to find as many of these flaws as possible and focus on them when thoughts about him enter your head. Some psychologists propose to deromanticize the image of a person, presenting him in ridiculous situations: for example, defecating, or in a clown hat and family shorts in front of an audience, or with female makeup on a serious face.
Mental pronunciation of the reasons for the impossibility of being together also helps to cope with love. Imagine what would really happen to you if you got married: exaggerate in the area where you come across unpleasant moments (betrayal, late coming home, habits that are unpleasant for you, etc.).
Some believe that in order to stop loving a person, you need to forget him and everything connected with him. In this article, I present a different position - do not forget! This is a part of your life, your invaluable experience, which is not so easy to forget, and it is not necessary. What to do with her? To work through, re-evaluate, take a fresh look at this complex, but such an important experience. Any experience in one way or another can be useful.
At the same time, after you have been able to process this experience, try to think about it less often. As soon as you feel that the thought of this person creeps up again - stop it in the bud! Immediately change the topic of the internal monologue, do something that requires you to have a good concentration of attention so that you cannot be distracted by thinking about it.
The end result of your inner work should be the following: it is necessary, despite all his shortcomings, to forgive and mentally let go of this person. This set point will complete an important period of your life, and you will be able to start a new one - a stage without this person. It is the feeling of inner incompleteness that haunts us and brings back in memory the painful experience of communicating with the object of love.
Change in behavior and environment.
The internal work with thoughts should be supported by the external - a change in behavior and the creation of favorable external conditions for parting with love. Remove or throw away his things, stop looking for something that reminds you of him and his life. Stop looking for meetings with him, try to completely exclude any contacts if possible. No wonder the famous proverb says: “Out of sight, out of mind!”
Sports and other active activities (dancing, martial arts, etc.) will help you get rid of the accumulated negative emotions, aggression and simply will not let your tone fall, which means that they will protect you to some extent from possible depression. Maintain your mood. Keep your spirits up, think positive, listen to upbeat music, have fun and go to events with friends.
When a relationship breaks down, time and space in the heart are always freed up. They need to be occupied with other things, and certainly interesting: new or long-forgotten, but joyful activities, interests, hobbies.
Folk wisdom again rushes to our aid: "The wedge is knocked out with a wedge." New relationships, new feelings - this is what can irrevocably crowd out old hopes and pain. The main thing to remember at the same time: you should not look for a person who looks like a former lover. This will create a risk of unnecessary memories of him or you will again step on the same rake - why do you need this?
Time is a good doctor. It will pass, and you will suddenly feel that you are now thinking less and less about this person, feelings are slowly cooling down and bothering you less. Thank yourself for the work you were able to do. And with relief, put a fat point!
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